It has taken me many years to begin to trust again. I find love to be hard because it is uncertain the outcome in regards to a relationship with a man. I think that it is a challenge to give my heart away to a man or to open myself up completely because I have been hurt so deeply before. I think most woman are burdened by the reality that their prince charming may never appear. I find that my life is easier when I do not have so many expectations for myself. I find it rather crippling to buy into the notion that a man will be that "prince I have been dreaming about" for my entire life. A part of me wishes that I could always live in a fairytale because reality is too harsh and frightening. I want to devout all of my positive energy to love without restrictions, reservations, or resentment this time around. I think that my worst enemy is my mind because I can talk myself out of love and into love depending on my mood in the moment. I want to love with an unconditional love and with a non-judgmental love. I do not want to be afraid to share myself with a person even if that means I may not spend the rest of my life with them. Love is a mysterious thing and often misinterpreted. I do not like that I have to ripe a person to shreds in my mind if our relationship does not work out---sometimes people do not fit and that is okay. I commit myself to love whole-heartily.

In the last few weeks I have spent an incredible amount of time meditating in the morning, during the day, and in the evening. I have found in my meeting place of my heart that the power of knowing myself and accepting myself is where I have discovered complete peace. I used to become lost in my trail of thoughts and trying to "fix" myself- but not anymore. Understanding that I am created to love myself first, and then to love others has helped me be a better person for everyone in my life. This journey of life has many turns but resting in the peace of the light that is in me gives me the assurance I need to go on. Hope is a gift that all people deserve to have. Seek happiness on a moment to moment basis- because without it- life is not worth living...Be blessed today!

I have been mediating every day at least twice a day. I have discovered that with an open mind I am able to be present. To be connected mind, body, and soul on a minute to minute...hour to hour ...day to day basis is indescribably fulfilling to the most enlightened part of my being. I cannot recall a time in my life that I accepted moment, myself, people, and felt completely connected and unashamed. I am in a place of clarity and being and knowing and a place that I am okay with rejection or if people do not like me and I am not loathing about it!!! It is so freeing and amazingly divine. To know self, accept self, love self, believe in self, and to not value what people say more than what God made and destined to be is the nirvana that I have attained. Nirvana- a place that is free from suffering. I have wrestled with thoughts in my mind for year and never able to come to a compromise so I reconcile self, accept self, love self, and live with self...so good to be happy...so blessed to be free and have clarity once again. Be blessed nation of soul seekers and may you find happiness in every endeavor that you encounter be it by choice or obligation...gain truth, wisdom, and knowledge to enrich your soul.

what a wasted amount of energy
it does not change anything
think thoroughly before speaking
only feel what you know
say what you believe and will die for
be ready to be alone...

I have regretted many things in my life
I have wondered about why I am where I am and if I am what I was destined to be. This kind of thinking can be exhausting. I guess it is better to just live my life without regret and to embrace and accept every single choice I make as well as consequence and to stick by it. It is hard to be this way.