Leave me imperfect
I'd rather it be that way
I like being unique
So I am not easily mistaken for someone else
Let me be imperfect as long as I am comfortable with it
I'd rather be imperfect as long as I think I can manage
I have tried to be something else and it only hinders my creativity
I will be awkward and not apologize for your discomfort
I will be loud
cover your ears to drown the sound
I will say stupid s¤*%t
Ignore me
I will do things that I don't mean
Forgive me
I would rather be imperfect as long as I can be
As long as I can manage
Let me be that way
I only live once
But I die thousands of times
Only to be reborn into a world that does not welcome creativity and uniqueness
I have been fighting before I was conceived
Let me rest my weary soul
Hold me if you wish
Accept me if you are strong enough
Love me if you can
But do not break my heart
It has taken lifetimes to mend...

I am currently reading a book by my favorite author, James Allen. There is a part in the book that speaks on nurturing the heart. I was thinking about the last time I nurtured my heart, mind, body, and spirit-it has been too long. I want to take care of my heart so I am strong and sincere with my intentions. I think that to nurture my heart I have to forgive people for bringing pain into my life. I have a difficult time with forgiveness depending on the level of pain that was caused. I try to give people around me the benefit to change and to love with no conditions. I want to see and experience the best in people. My pain comes from the reality that some people do not have good intentions for me. I need to take more time to love myself and not to be consumed with thoughts that will not bring anymore time to my life. I believe that cultivating my heart involves accepting who I am when I am strong and what I become when I am weak. I want to be solid and true to who I am and who I am aspiring to be.

Love is unmistakeably the height and depth of divine enlightenment of what a human soul can experience here on earth. I never understood why people choose to love when the reality of being hurt is inevitable. Until I dove, heart first, I finally understood it...Life without love is meaningless. Even though losing love hurts; I would rather have loved and feel pain than to have never loved ...Shakespeare was a great man.

Why is it that communication is easier when you are talking to a perfect stranger? I went out last night with some friends and have had so many things on my mind. I have been thinking about work, relationships, and finishing my degrees. It is amazing what a cocktail will do to eliminate the metaphorical barriers that exist and hinder us from sharing ourselves with people we are close to. Anyways I went out last night and enjoyed it very much. I had an opportunity to share about myself and people were interested in listening to me last night. They were not bored or pretended to be interested in what I had to say---they really were--. I enjoyed having a night out with friends and communicating about everything! It was liberating. Although I long for this kind of communication in my personal relationships, it just does not seem possible...all of the time. Things that I desire to share, with people in my life, I am unable to share with them. I am scared to share because of judgment. I sometimes wonder if this kind of communication (open communication) is only possible when you really do not know a person or desire to really become their friend. Friendships, and relationships are exhausting and take work, they are not always fun. I think I communicate better with strangers because I know that their problem will not become mine because we are only connected for a moment. Well I think my mind is tired of trying to find a way to communicate effectively without being disrespectful to the person that I love.